So, I have a bone to pick with some of you of the female gender out there. Normally, I'd refer to you as 'ladies'. However, the thrust of this post is that those of you I'm referring to are not acting like ladies at all.
I was brought up by my mother and my grandmother who were both stern, strong women. I have a huge respect for women and see as both equals and as wonderfully different. I still have, what I consider to be, gentlemanly habits, including opening the doors for for women, pulling out chairs, etc.
I also have normal human courtesy habits, like saying 'please', 'thank you', 'excuse me' etc.
This last thing is where things seem to be going astray for some you out there.
I realize there are lots of sleazy, lecherous douche bags out there. I realize that if you give some guys an inch, they'll take a mile. I understand that some guys can not only be jerks, they can actually be dangerous. I really do get it.
But girls, it doesn't excuse you from being a polite human being. Case in point: I'm going through the grocery store, and coming around the corner my shopping cart nearly collides with a young woman's. I smile, back up and say "Excuse me". Not only does she not say anything back, but she won't even make eye contact.
Now, if this were a singular incident, I would chock it up to the individual in question. But it's not. I've seen this behavior become rampant. In a massive attempt to dissuade even the slightest suggestion of flirtation, you've thrown the baby out with the bath water. You've taken up a scorched earth policy. You've decided that if you can't have the interactions you want, you won't have any at all.
My reaction to this is twofold. First, it's sad that you feel that a smile or a 'hello' or a 'thank you' so compromises your personal space that you've forgone them for starring at the ground or in many cases, glaring callously. But it also makes me angry.
I'm sorry that some of you have been pestered by men. I'm sorry that you have to deal with douche bags. However, it does not give you a right to become one yourself. I deserve as much courtesy and respect as you do. Not because I'm a man, but because I'm a person.
My instinct is to just stop holding doors open or pulling out chairs. But I can't, it's ingrained in me. But the next time a 'lady' can't muster the bare necessities of civility, I'm going to call her on it. Politely.
EDIT: I realize that I come off sounding both really angry and very saintly in this post. I'm neither.
I'm a complete lech and pervert. However, I reserve that for those that have consented and no one would suspect otherwise.
Additionally, my post came out a little more angry than I actually am. Let's call it cathartic.
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